Tuesday, April 15, 2014
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
And we twist: 7 vows of the Hindu marriage.
We'll know that there are 7 vows in a hindu wedding. Where bride and groom do the spinning-spanning around the fire whilst the pandit do some rap in Sanskrit. For all you who don't know what is the meaning of those sanskrit chants, and also what they "actually" mean(as per present times), read this. The perception is of a classic arranged marriage, forced at this new generation guy and girl who hardly know each other but are about to take the holy-shmoly vows! Let's see what these vows mean to them.
First vow:
धर्मेच अर्थेच कामेच इमां नातिचरामि ।
धर्मेच अर्थेच कामेच इमं नातिचरामि ॥
Meaning: Initiating
the promise, the groom says that their love has become firm by taking the first
step. He promises to provide everything for her as well as family’s welfare and
happiness.
Actual meaning: Initiating the
promise, the groom says that now he has been well trapped. So, to keep his
mummy,papa, bhai, bhen taya, tayi, chacha, chahi, chote chacha, choti chachi,
mama, mami, maasad, maasi, and some non relevant people who came in the wedding
happy, he has to work like a bonded labour and kill all his ambitions, happiness,
dump all girlfriends and selflessly sacrifice all the happiness for this
unknown woman who'll legally become his wife in the next 20 minutes.
M: In
return, the bride happily takes the responsibility of home, food and finances.
She hereby promises to satiate all her responsibilities for the welfare of the
household, family and the children.
AM: In return, the bride
will unhappily takes the liability of cleaning house, cooking food 5 times a
day, nourish & run after kids and make monthly budgets! She has to keep her
career aside, hobbies beside and abide whatever has been written and being said
in Sanskrit.
Second vow:
M: Initiating
the second vow, the groom promises to protect the bride and the family by all
his strength in god’s name.
AM: Initiating the second
vow, the groom promises to be a Jackie Chan and *Dhishum* away the goons to protect the
woman and the toddlers, in the name of god (which god, you decide!).
M: In
return the bride promises that at all times, she shall continue to fill his
heart with strength and courage. She promises to be his strength and stand by
him in all tough and turbulent times.
AM: In return the bride
promises that all the times, she shall jump, stretch, spin,
shake..ahem..basically be a cheerleader with shiny pom-pom in hands and cheer
for the fainting husband(instead of joining husband in bashing that bulky-purse-snatching-asshole-chor who dared to punch the dear hubby). She promises to
cheer and just stand by him in all tough and turbulent times.(because that's
what is written & being said in Sanskrit)
Third vow:
गृभ्णामि ते सुप्रजास्त्वाय हस्तं मया पत्या जरदष्टिर्यथासः ।
भगो अर्यमा सविता पुरन्धिर्मह्यांत्वादुःगार्हपत्याय देवाः ॥
M: In
the third promise, the bride accepts the groom as her husband and promising
this she says that every man in her life will be secondary for her. Her husband
will be all and all for her in this whole universe.
AM: In the third promise
bride says, ditch your bitches now or..
M: In
return, the groom accepts the bride as his wife and promises for their
prosperity and wealth as a couple. He also wishes good up-bringing for their
children.
AM: In return the groom
promises that together they'll have the best food, roam in a ferrari, put on
the best fashion brands and also wishes that may the kids be intelligent enough
to grow up good by themselves. But, says nothing about extra-marital affairs
because, well it is not written in Sanskrit.
Fourth vow:
गृभ्णामि ते सुप्रजास्त्वाय हस्तं मया पत्या जरदष्टिर्यथासः ।
भगो अर्यमा सविता पुरन्धिर्मह्यांत्वादुःगार्हपत्याय देवाः ॥
M: In
the fourth promise, the groom confesses that she has brought sanctity and
auspiciousness in his life. He prays to God to bestow him and her with good
children and grant them a long life.
AM: In the fourth promise,
the groom confesses that the girl whom his maasi's best friend recommended and
is being married to, is cute. He would never be able to bag such a cutesy in
his frigging life! He prays to god and whilst praying can't stop about thinking
of making babies.
M: In
return the bride promises to acquire happiness and harmony via respect, faith,
mutual love and understanding.
AM: In return the bride
promises to try her best to transform the langoor she's being married to, into
a nice gentleman, by the non-violent means.(this is written in sanskrit!)
Fifth vow:
M: Giving the fifth
promise, the groom accepts her has his best-friend.
AM: In the fifth promise,
the groom's tubelight starts working and he comes to a conclusion that the girl
is not THAT bad and tags her as his BFF.
M: The
bride promises to honour the groom with all the respect and love she can.
AM: The bride promises to
honour the groom with all the respect and love she can as long as he behaves
with all the respect and love with her too. Saying that she also promises to
care, love and respect him 10 fold if he loves her back and accepts her with
all his heart.
Sixth vow:
M: Taking
the sixth round around the holy fire, the groom wishes for her happiness and
the bride commits to stand by his side always.
AM: Taking the sixth round
around the holy fire, the groom holds the bride's hand tighter representing no
intentions to leave or betray her in this or upcoming as many lives as god
wishes him to live and in each, he'll make sure of preserving her beautiful
smile by ANY FUCKING MEANS! The bride lowers her eyelids, smiles and displays
complete faith on her man.
Seventh vow:
सखा सप्तपदा भव ।
सखायौ सप्तपदा बभूव ।
सख्यं ते गमेयम् ।
सख्यात्
ते मायोषम् ।
सख्यान्मे
मयोष्ठाः ।
M: The
bride promises that she has become his spouse by the law of God, holy fire and
the Holy Scriptures. The promises she has made have been spoken with pure heart
and pure mind. All the angels are witnesses to this fact. She shall neither
deceive him nor will she ever let him down.
AM: I love you.
M: Finishing
the promise ceremony, the groom promises the bride that by walking this seventh
step with her, their love and companionship have become inseparable and
eternal. They have experienced spiritual union in God.
AM: I love you too.
I wish every arrange
marriage could begin with such good understanding, most of the times they do.
Marriages in India are still a humongous thing. It not only a union of two
people but a union of two families. The new generation understands this and
under the burden of this "union of families" thingy, they end up
sacrificing their love, happiness and memories for their parent's wish or ego.
I would request, if any elderly is reading this blog that, yes, marriage is a
gigantic thing for families, but first it is the most prominent thing for the
bride & the groom. Let kids marry the one whom they feel is worth their
affection. Have faith in them, please.
The blog post
carries a lighthearted mood and the motive of the blog is not to hurt anyone’s
feelings. The interpretations are a result of the
blogger's amateur thinking and please do forgive him for if he has
written something that shouldn't have been. Criticism and feedback is requested
in the comments section.
References
-
http://ibelievethat.in/seven-the-7-promises
https://www.etsy.com/market/bride_groom_cake
http://ibelievethat.in/seven-the-7-promises
https://www.etsy.com/market/bride_groom_cake
Friday, February 7, 2014
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
Twitter Bhagya Vidhata: Milestones in the evolution of Indian Social media.
Blogasode - 1
*Concider the monologue is by Anupam Kher, read it in his
voice*
In its early days, twitter and facebook were just among
other desi social websites like desimartini, ibibo, funmaza etc. , basically
another website to add the known and flirt with the unknown. Youth met and
mingled on these to pass their time, but one very day...
*Curtain opens*
*sounds of a group shouting “Jai Shree Ram! Jai Shree Ram!”*
*lights on*
*A group of women come center stage laughing & enjoying .
Suddenly, a group of men come running from the opposite direction and start
bashing them. Then every woman coming gets a royal treatment of pulling beastly from
hair, throwing them swivelling on the ground and kicking boots in stomach
mercilessly etc. while they cry and ask repeatedly why are they getting beaten?
And trying to escape, whilst a reporters recording it all.*
*lights off, noise fades down slowly, leaving a single, loud
scream of a woman crying for mercy, gets louder and vanishes.*
*silence*
*curtains closes*
2009 Mangalore, Sri Ram Sena beats up women in a pub calling
them the termites of Indian culture who are spoiling the society and the
upcoming generation.
There was anger in the youth, but
discussing it with parents was useless because according to them going to pub
and consuming liquor is a bad thing. And, even though they condemn the incident
from their heart, they will never advocate for the bashed up kids as it will
give an impression to their own children that they are okay with them going to
pub, which they don’t want.
Youth discussed it. The discussion
travelled from a distressed minds to canteens, to group discussions and finally
to facebook. As the news spread, the anger grew exponentially, but it was aimless, till Namita Malhotra channelised it by creating a facebook page called “Consortium
of Pub-Going, Loose and Forward Women”. The aim was to tell the cheap politicians
that they can’t use the youth to bring laurels to their dirty politics. The youth is united
& connected and will strike back to teach you a lesson. People joined the campaign on facebook in huge
numbers. A scattered youth on the internet finally got united for the cause.
*curtain opens*
*a party’s office, a hall, people talking to each other and
an elderly man sitting on the table discussing something with some people in
suit*
*a party member comes in with a box*
“Sir, courier.”
*On the nod of the elderly man, party member keeps it on the
table and leaves as he was busy in the discussion*
“Chai!” he commands.
*In few minutes, a kid of about 10 year old, in old dirty
loose shirt and nicker, brings chai. Takes out the glass of chai from an old
& bent steel glass holder and keeps it near the courier box which reminded
the elderly person to open the courier box*
*He opens the courier while the kid gives chai to other
people.*
“WHAT IS THIS?!” He shouts.
*With his index finger & thumb and with a disgusting
face expression he carefully picks out a bright pink thong from its string out
of the box, to which the chai wala kid starts laughing loudly and people
sitting on the table join chaiwala*
*Half the people of the room go red in embarrassment and the
other half red in anger, then the suited people and the chaiwala forcefully control
their laughter, chuckling.*
“Sir, courier!” Comes a loud sound from the door
*and the suited people burst into laughter again with the chaiwala, this time uncontrollably*
Over 500 pink panties were delivered to the office of “Shri
Ram Sena” as a protest against the goondaism they displayed at the pub in the
name of moral policing. For the cowardly act of beating women in groups by Shri Ram Sena, this time the symbol was not the "Bangles" as it seemed they are ok with bangles. They needed a much blunt message this time. Hence, the "Pink Chaddi".
The “Pink Chaddi” campaign became very popular and
mainstream media gave it a good coverage resulting in preventive custody of about
140 members of Shri Ram Sena(Including the senior leader Pramod Muthalik), so that they may not create any mayhem in the
city at the Valentine’s day.
Youth
now had the power to think collectively, exchange ideas and act accordingly,
and were good at it. This event was no less Gandhian as it shook the souls of
the target, conveyed the message and obviously with non-violence. Indian Social Media unknowingly took a step towards a
journey that they themselves never knew will judder the heaviest thrones of the
Indian politics so conspicuously.
“Twitter Bhagya Vidhata: Milestones in the evolution of
Indian Social media” is a series of blog-episodes or “Blogasodes” of the most relevant
and popular events happened in the history of Indian Social Media that shaped it into what
a huge power it is today. Events
mentioned are in the vicinity of reality and slightly dramatized keeping the
entertainment of the reader in concideration. The motive of the blog is not to
hurt anyone’s feelings. Criticism and feedback is requested in the comments
section.
Blogasode -1: Pink
chaddi campaign
Monday, December 30, 2013
Tuesday, November 12, 2013
Music Maestro: Mikey McCleary
I'm not a fan of remixes but Mikey, if you're reading this,
you're the baap of all the Music directors out there who try their hands on
remixing or as they say "reviving" the track. You must have heard the
remixes of Mikey in some movie or as some ad jingle but here i give you the
list of 5 best remixes (not in a ranking order because all of these are so
frigging beautiful!)
1) Chalte Chalte yun hi koi - This remix has a very relaxed
and calm feel. Singer Mauli Dave has done complete justice to this song. The
saxophone just adds to the lovely track making it the late night anthem. The
original is form the movie Pakeeza(1972) sung by Lata Mangeshkar and music by
Ghulam Mohammad
2) Yeh Sama, Sama Hai Yeh Pyar Ka - The original is from the movie Jab Jab
phool Khile(1965) Sung by Lata
Mangeshkar and Music by: Kalayanji, Anandji. This version is again sung so
beautifully by the melodious Mauli Dave that it takes you to the dream world.
3) Kabhi Kabhi mere dil mei - Originally by the movie Kabhi
Kabhi (1976) sung by Lata Mangeshkar and music by Khayyam. the continuous snaps
along with the jazzy music makes it a peppy yet soothing track. I totally love
this one by Mikey!
https://soundcloud.com/mikey-mccleary/kabhi-kabhi-mere-dil-mein
4) Dhak Dhak - Originally from the movie: Beta (1991),
Singers: Anuradha Paudwal and Udit Narayan Jha, Music Directors: Anand-Milind.
Revamped for the movie Nautanki Saala with the singers Saba Azad, Geet Sagar,
Bruno Carvalo, Santosh Sawant is the new and awesome version of the same ol'
legendary "Dhak Dhak".
5) Mast Kalandar - It is a punjabi folk song and many
singers have sung mast kalandar. Mikey has produced two versions of the song
with the euphonious voice of Rekha Bhardwaj. One has a nice folkish
clap-and-sing music and the other is a rock version!!
Mikey, you make brilliant music which gives us a nice
company in our joyful and cozy moments. I'm a fan of yours! Keep making the
awesome music!!
Others, for listening to more of his work please visit
Mike's website: http://mikeymccleary.com/
Cheers!
Thursday, October 10, 2013
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